Categories
Travel Stories

The City That Calls to Me

Why is it that everyone wants to write about Paris? That artists, both from Hemingway and the Fitzgeralds to Jay Z, flock to the area? Is it the artistic glamour that is found all over the city? The calm that washes over you as you sit in café, sipping a café au lait, people watching or gazing out into the Seine from your perch on the banks? The awe felt at the dedication to keeping history preserved and integrated into daily life (even if that preservation pays off in millions of tourist dollars pouring in) with their apartments from the 1500’s?

Or, maybe it’s the fashion, the alcohol, the food, the undertones of glitz and glamour in this city. There’s something about Paris: you can be in the dirtiest part town and see someone dressed impeccably well and feel that they are well-read and well-versed in life’s affairs.  It’s the idea that anyone can look beautiful in Paris, no matter the budget.

A Parisian woman can save for years to buy her first Chanel bag, channeling an inner beauty with her black cigarette pants, loafers, white blouse, her hair slightly a mess and no make-up (save for maybe a little mascara or a bit of rouge). Her look is simple, most likely cheap (minus that Chanel bag) with a lot of her items bought at the Monoprix down the street, and yet, it’s an iconic look. A look that millions of women all over the world will spend thousands of dollars trying to replicate. But, replicating something pure and beautiful is never possible.


The fashion and understated glamour is an undercurrent running through Paris, but for those who have been there, you know it’s more than that. It’s a decadent lifestyle that seems to take little effort. The tiny, cramped apartments are more than just a funny story to tell friends back home, more than that stereotypical lifestyle that is so prominent in movies. It’s part of the yearning for something more than just material, more than large homes and clutter.

Living in a minuscule apartment while owning Louis Vuitton, Dior, or Chanel is something of a Parisian right.  Spending liberally on high quality items, be them cheeses, chocolates, wines, or clothing is always the right move with Parisians. It’s always the desire that is important, the need for the purest form, the creativity unleashed in every mundane aspect of the city; you’re always dressing for lifestyle in Paris, never for comfort and ease.

The most splendid apartments are large and baroque in their finishings with gilded gold throughout, but they’re not of the monstrous mansions you will find in L.A. or the many-leveled marbled apartments in New York. Even the most decadent things in Paris are simple.


So, that’s it, right? Artists, although they may not all admit it to themselves, love the decadence. Why else would you sit in front of a computer, a notebook, or a typewriter, banging out the ideas in your head? There’s something so egotistical about being a writer, an artist, that it’s nearly comical. We say we hate the spotlight, we’d rather be on the sidelines, and when it comes to showcasing our work we can be as shy as a preschooler on her first day. But, the glamour of life gets to us. The royalties come in, the attention is doted upon us, the drinking until 4am isn’t just to survive anymore – it’s to celebrate.

What is more decadent than putting your thoughts onto any type of medium, bringing a little bit of you, piece by piece, into the spotlight and thrusting it into viewers faces – making them wonder over which character is the true novelist, what part of the painting is the artist, and if that song is the beginning or end of a great love felt by the singer.


When I look out my window I see trees. Trees and the great expanse of a prairie horizon. There is no glitz and glamour out here; instead, I find myself the most attentive to my actions and the most calm and meditative when in nature. There’s something soothing about being amongst living things that have lived for millions of years, surviving each and every type of apocalyptic problem. Growing back after the atrocities and becoming even stronger. The freshness to the air leaves a crisp feeling both inside and out.

But, the sound of the Parisian streets beats in my heart, the laughter, chatter and tinkling of cups and plates in a café coarse through my bloodstream. The city calls to me, to my inner artistic ego. There is a yearning, a strong and faithful plea to come back to the city that makes me feel the most alive. A burning desire, one you can compare to that of missing a lover.

Although I feel far-removed from it all and this is where I’ll stay, the glitz and the glamour, the ability to wear an absolutely breathtaking outfit no matter the time of the day, gets to me. The belief that any type of artistic dream is possible when you are within the city’s borders. The hope is alive, much like for those actors still slinging coffees in the local Starbucks in L.A., clinging to the hope that one day, maybe, they’ll be able to reach the Stars and live amongst them as an equal.

Categories
Life

Are Anniversaries Really That Important?

I’m not 100% certain on how long my husband and I have been together. We met at a cabin party, and eventually became serious, but the specific date? No idea. There was actually a highly entertaining night where I asked him and he became flustered and nervous because he thought I’d be getting mad at him for not knowing, when in reality, it was me who couldn’t pin down the date. Maybe that was when he knew marrying me would be a good idea.

Of course, I know what our wedding anniversary is. That’s a little more concrete and more memorable than some, ‘yeah we’re together’ moment during dating. Because, dating when you’re an adult is a lot more different than those exciting days when a boy would come up to you in the schoolyard, ask you to go out and then never speak to you again. I mean, I distinctly remember the beginning of mine and Marc’s great romance in 8th grade, but my now-husband? Who knows.

Recently, our first anniversary went by. Excited to eat the top of our wedding cake we had saved for the occassion and an expensive champagne I couldn’t drink at our wedding, I planned, and I use that word loosely, an anniversary day/evening: champagne, cake and Chinese food. That was as far as the planning went. Unfortunately, a storm ripped through our city and surrounding areas and my husband was called away to work for a full week. He came home just before midnight the day before we were to leave on a trip to Australia, exhausted and worn-down, so we boarded the plane the next morning and continued on living our lives. We never did get to celebrate our 1st anniversary together. At least, not until a month later where we just ate the cake and drank the champagne near-randomly during one Sunday afternoon, no fancy dinner (or take-out) planned. More of a ‘let’s just eat this before I eat it on you’ kind of day.

Instead of being crestfallen about missing our first anniversary, I shrugged and had a day eating whatever I wanted and watching whatever I wanted. It was a pretty good day, I must say. Yes, I was disappointed that we couldn’t do anything and celebrate such a ‘milestone’ (if you can’t make it one year, then why’d you get married in the first place?), and doubly disappointed that I couldn’t eat or drink the deliciousness I had planned on ordering, but I found myself not really caring that we missed the specific day. We jokingly said ‘happy anniversary’ when I made coffee for him, bleary-eyed at an ungodly hour before he went off to work an ungodly amount of hours, knowing I wouldn’t see him until I was already in the throes of delightful sleep that night.

Because, what is one simple day? Nothing. It’s a day that worked out in planning your wedding, it’s a day that cemented your relationship, taking it from casual to serious. It’s nothing more than a day.

Now, the 25th and 50th wedding anniversaries are something to be celebrated. You’ve made it a long time with someone without divorcing or killing them and that’s definitely a cause for a party. Instead of celebrating a day, you’re celebrating many, many happy (and some maybe not so happy) years of marriage. That kind of anniversary logic I can whole-heartedly get behind.

The anniversaries in between? Not so much. I have a friend who celebrates when they started dating and when they got married. Two different days. One celebrates in months and half-years, much like a first-time mother celebrates every month since her child has been born. While cute and incredibly nauseating each of those scenarios are, do they really truly matter? Do the smaller anniversaries matter as much as the bigger ones? Does it matter if you’re already loving each other and living and appreciating one another, not necessarily every day, but for most days of the year? Is it really that important to shout from the rooftops that this is your one true love, but only to be shouted once a year?

My answer is no. It’s not. Especially that last part. Social media doesn’t need a long-winded paragraph on how you and your one and only spent your anniversary. A nice picture will do. Let me like it quickly and scroll by without rolling my eyes.

If you’re celebrating every day like it’s your anniversary, then why go all out wonderfully and exuberently on just one day of the year, buying gifts and expensive wines and dinner? If you haven’t already guessed, my feelings on Valentine’s Day are pretty similar. Again, some yummy food and baked goods are all I really need.

To me, spending money on anniversary presents seems silly and not the best way to use your money. And, I use the term ‘your’ as in your money that you share. Are expensive anniversary presents really that important in the long (or short, depending how you see things) scheme of life? If you can afford to buy an expensive present for your anniversary, chances are you can afford to buy it, just because. And, when your money is all tied up together, then does it matter from whom it’s being given? Stay in, turn down the lights and enjoy that present a whole lot more than you would a pair of earrings or a watch.

My seemingly cynical point is this: there’s no need to go all out on an expensive hotel room or dinner or champagne just because it’s your anniversary. Do these things because you want to do these things for fun, that you would do them because it’s a Tuesday or a long-weekend, as well as your anniversary. Do it because these are the types of things you both like. If neither of you enjoy fancy dinners, then why waste the money, time and awkward car-ride and dinner conversation?

For us, we like ordering take-out (something we rarely do, even in this age of UberEats and Skip the Dishes) and sitting on the couch in PJ’s or sweats and enjoying each other’s company. Much like we do nearly every night together. While I enjoy an expensive bottle of champagne and even spendier restaurants, my husband hates them with a passion. He feels awkward and out of place and I would rather enjoy that with someone who will have a good time, like my girlfriends, than someone who is going to feel uncomfortable the whole evening.

Spend time with one another as you normally would, as you normally do. Use your anniversary to celebrate you and the things you both enjoy, but don’t feel pressured to go all out or even feel guilty if you both wake up forgetting what day it is. It’s just a day, anyways.

Categories
opinions

Can I Work in a Social Media Age?

I don’t think I can be the type of person that Instagram needs you to be.

I don’t like reels. I honestly do not enjoy videos and would rather read, or look at static images.

I don’t make any stories.

I have no schtick.

It’s just me. Take it or leave it.

It’s why, though I made up a handle for this blog because, you know, marketing and all that jazz, I have yet to post. I don’t want to taint who I am, what this blog is all about. I don’t want to stress over the perfect photo for Instagram (even though it seems very rare that people actually post real photos anymore…the whole thing I absolutely loved about Instagram) and what great marketing campaign I should use.

I don’t want to end up worrying about posting the right stuff and falling down the rabbit hole of listicles and the like. There’s nothing wrong with listicles; I actually enjoyed writing a few of them. You’ll find some type of listicle-styled posts here every so often because easily broken down information is fun, and at times, feels right. But, I don’t want it to be the only thing this blog is about. Social media and click-bait titles.

Perhaps it’s not the best way of thinking when you want to make money from your craft, and who doesn’t want to make a little something something from what they love to do? But, when you need to be true to yourself, to your vision, it makes it a little harder.

I’ll end up posting on Instagram soon, I know. As soon as my flowers start blooming and the world looks shiny and new, again, I’ll get excited and feel the need to share what I see with the world. Who knows what that will look like, but I’m trying my bestest not to worry about it. Everything about this blog is focused on intuition. I may not have posts about it now, but intuition is my favourite piece of advice for everyone. Go with your gut and all that.

Besides, you can always, like Ross says, pivot.